
Emily

Posted on April 27, 2012 by Avi Chanales
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……….Former Rutgers student Dharun Ravi sat in trial awaiting his sentence regarding his alleged hate crime against his former gay roommate, Tyler Clementi. The resurfacing of this news story almost a year and a half after Tyler’s suicide forced the world to re-confront the harsh reality of gay teen suicides. Tyler’s suicide in October 2011 marked the fifth suicide in just a short three-week period and prompted a nationwide awareness effort regarding the serious danger of gay teen suicide.
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Emily
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Three weeks ago, my friend Emily, also sat in a room awaiting her sentence. After 21 years of hiding her identity, Emily courageously came out in a public speech in front of the entire Orthodox Jewish community at Penn. She bravely spoke of her struggles growing up gay in a traditionalist community, but the main portion of her speech focused on her struggles with suicide. For the Orthodox community, gay teen suicide was no longer a news story; it was personal.
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Emily
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Lesbian, gay, and bisexual youth are four times more likely to attempt suicide than their heterosexual peers. The Suicide Prevention Resource Center estimated that between 30 to 40% of LGB youth have attempted suicide. A major factor influencing suicidal ideations is internalized homophobia that leads to self-loathing and deep internal conflicts about their sexual orientation.
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Emily described her constant questioning of her own self-worth. She described days that were so overwhelmed with depression that she could barely find the energy or motivation to do anything. She would just sit, numb and immobilized.
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For many gay youth, it is their religious beliefs that add to their internal conflicts. Emily described times when she simultaneously hated God but also felt like He was the only person she could turn to.
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Emily
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In response to the suicides of teenagers who were bullied because they were gay, author Dan Savage and his husband Terry Miller founded the “Its Gets Better Project”, to inspire hope in teens struggling with their sexual identity. Emily embodies this mission. Her courage, poise, and optimism instills hope not only in those still struggling with their sexual identities, but to everyone she encounters. The faith she instills? That one day we might actually live in a world that sees sexual orientation as irrelevant.

About the Author: Avi Chanales is a Candidate for Bachelor of Arts degree in Cognitive Neuroscience at the University of Pennsylvania. Class of 2012