TonyWardStudio.com

C-Note

Posted on March 28, 2011 by Paulette Fallon

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C-NOTE

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clinical diagnosis….fragments.

fragmented light that bursts forth,

brilliant and dark….,

open and shadowed,

obscure, yet eclectic,

to whom do you want to address?

to whom do you want to speak?

what is it you want?

what are you looking to find?

i am…that is all.

in being i am aware…..

of you,

your delusions,

your detours,

your denial…..

your default…

enter me without skin…

enter me in truth,

enter…..come in,

sit for a moment, if only to negotiate sin,

sin, sacred sin…..

for there we begin,

a cordial shake of the hand,

a wispy kiss on the cheek,

unsettled, and unknown,

swim within, dive into,

the depth you have yet to acknowledge….

Ready To Eat

Posted by Paulette Fallon on March 27, 2011

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READY TO EAT

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Open up,
spread yourself,
Like a banquet of pleasure unto me…
Supple, sweet, delectable.
Sinner, suffer, selectable.
I nibble, i nip,
I taste, you tempt….
A meal, a morsel….
A bacchanalian feast!
I dive in to your divinity,
I delve into your desire…..
Napkin?

Slap!

Posted on March 26, 2011 by Paulette Fallon

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SLAP!

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SLAP! 360 degrees.
What do you see?
what you believed to be?
Not me,
wrong answer.
SLAP!180 degrees.
what do you see?
What you envisoned was me?
Wrong answer
SLAP! 45 degrees.
What do you see?
what you thought was me?
Wrong answer.
SLAP! right in front of me.
What do you see?
Paulette.
Good answer.

Self Portrait By Ed Simmons

Posted on October 28, 2010

……….Ed Simmons recently made the 3000 mile trip from Los Angeles to Philadelphia by train to visit his mom after the recent death of his father. He and I met earlier this year in happier times while we were producing an adult film in Los Angeles. This time around our mood was more somber. We met at The Drake Tavern to reminisce about the life and times of his dad. In his own words, Ed reflects on his fathers last wishes.

Train Ride

……….My Father told my Mother this twice, during his last week with us, “something happened, something powerful”. Father Mac administered to my Dad, the Seventh Sacrament! I got a voice mail from him on September 12th, 2010; he said “Hi Eddie, how ya doing, OK, we have some ____ _____ for girls, OK, well I’m interested you know, ever since your Mother said to me, hahahaa, I am just a girlfriend, looking for someone to play house with. OK, I’ll see you around, I LOVE YOU” – TO ME!!!

On The Way Home

He was a tough old marine. References to love was something always so hard for him to express to me. This was really something. Expressions using the word love were always so hard for him to hear from me too. He gave this gift to me, his last words, to me, from Dad. I always knew he did, he knew I always loved him too, Fathers and Sons, its complex!

Road Crossing

Things were clean between us when he left 20 years ago, up in the Alaskan Bush. We worked it out. We had no choice. It felt not to much different than the two of us being locked up in a padded room. Flying back down into the lower 48, we became good friends! I wear his watch, I carry my money in his wallet now too. I know Dad got what he wanted, you know, like fine wine, he got better with time, I prayed tonight he got some time and was granted a one on one with God,

I bet he asked God if he would invite Mom in early. It just breaks my heart seeing her, watching her. In my soul, I know there is a special place in heaven for all those struck down by cancer. It has been a while for me to write anything on my blog. Its been hard. I’ve been a mess. Just too hurt to cry! I love you Mommy, don’t know where in the hell that came from. Face to face my last words to her were filled with the emotion of Love. I guess I had to tell her this once more, in those words, I felt she needed to hear it one more time from me. I probably will never see her again. Damn this trip has been hard on me. It has been even harder on my Mom.

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