Photography and Text by Ria Vaidya
Sometimes it takes a while for a person to realize let alone admit their inner feelings; this is even truer when the feelings are towards another person. Layla had spent months pining after Mark and he had no idea. She would sit around waiting for him to come to her, but as each day passed, he didn’t.
Her relationship with him was one of the cutest. They were close friends and confidantes for the longest time and people around them would always tell her how perfect they were for each other. After months of denying it, she finally realized the truth behind those statements. Unfortunately, she realized it the day he was leaving for three months. Saying good-bye to him opened her eyes to the obvious: she loved him.
When he came back to campus in the fall, their friendship grew even closer. She would find herself in a constant state of either thinking of him or wanting to be with him. In both instances, Layla was blissfully happy.
However as much of her energy she put into him, the relationship in her head wasn’t a reality. He perceived their relationship to be completely platonic. Was she wasting her time loving a guy who didn’t see her the same way?
Feeling like she was on a rollercoaster that was never going to end, Layla decided to take matters into her own hands by slowly showing her feelings to Mark. As she started hinting towards the idea of more, it was a little too late as she found herself sitting in his room listening to him talk about this new girl he had met. Regret and heartbreak were all that filled Layla as the boy she loved completely disregarded her.
She wanted him, but he didn’t know. As much as she loved him, he would always say things that she didn’t want to hear. His words would cut deep and leave her feeling as if nothing was ever going to change. On many occasions, Layla wanted to just stop, to shut off her feelings and move on. She hated that she couldn’t tell him how she felt and that he was oblivious to her feelings for him.
He consumed her; there wasn’t a day that would go by without thoughts of him filling her head. Every time people would ask if he was her boyfriend she would coyly deny it. Yet inside she was giddy at the fact that the chemistry between them resembled that of a relationship, a relationship that she desperately craved.
“Just give it time” and “he will realize soon enough” were the common phrases that Layla’s best friend would tell her about her situation with Mark. So that is what she did, she waited and watched in the corner, alone. Mark loved her but he wasn’t in love with her. If only he wanted her the way others did.
Photography and Text by Ria Vaidya, Copyright 2015
About The Author: Ria Vaidya is a sophomore enrolled in the College of the University of Pennsylvania, Class of 2018.