As a spiritualist, I am not someone who necessarily believes in coincidences. Every person we interact with, major event, or circumstance finds its way into our lives for a reason, whether we understand that reasoning at the time, or not. Throughout my childhood, my mother struggled to keep a roof over our heads, causing us to relocate often, sometimes multiple times in a year. At the time, I deemed the instability and hardship as a misfortune, but I always had a knack for making friends and adapting to new environments with ease. Being exposed to all cultures and walks of life made it easy for me to understand others. I could relate to anybody in a room full of strangers. People have always naturally gravitated towards me, which I assumed to be simply because I was a nice person. Little did I know, the universe was only setting the stage for a greater purpose much larger than my circumstances, destined to be fulfilled.
It wasn’t until within the last couple of years that I realized why the Universe has put me on the journey I’ve experienced so far. My humanitarian nature of giving back and helping others has gradually intertwined itself with my spiritual practices, and my love for the psychology of humans. This, along with being easily relatable, has allowed me to explore and expand on my purpose of healing others around me. Whether it be through my tarot reading, spiritual guidance, or simple positive reinforcement, inner healing and balance is extremely important in the midst of this chaotic 3D reality. No amount of value could ever be placed on the genuine satisfaction it gives me to be able to guide others in their healing to become a better version of themselves. Past experiences I once saw as a burden, I now consider a blessing in disguise. A gift from the universe, if you will. A gift that has molded me into someone who is compassionate, empathetic, logical and raw, wrapped in high frequency vibrations meant to enlighten those I encounter.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR : Milan is originally from New York, now residing in Philadelphia. Aspiring model and real estate broker. Free thinker. Humanitarian by nature. Spiritual revolutionary in the making. To access previous articles by Milan Burnett, click here: https://tonywardstudio.com/blog/i-am_that_i_am/
So, what am I up to these days? Sexually, of course.
Who am I as a woman, a lover…someone who knows herself in a way that is shaped by my past.
This question is deep and substantial, but let’s focus on the present. The satisfaction of knowing my desires and needs and being able to obtain them is something that many never achieve.
So here is a little of me.
Let’s talk of “simple pleasures” which are not simple in any sense. Having my lover against me, so intense, their scent, the quite whispers, giggles and moans of pleasure as we enjoy intimacy and connection. An experience reached by opening one’s mind and vulnerabilities to their partner. To allow myself to open this way can only described as “next level” and goes well beyond sexual actions.
Toys are something that are always a part of my fun. I have a convenient spot where they are kept in a box that can be locked. Even big girls need a toy box. Inside is an expansive collection of playthings, so many that sometimes I forget a few. When away from home, there are one or two hidden away for use in whatever situation may arise. Creativity…solo or otherwise is always welcome.
I am a tease. Leaning in and quietly suggesting scenarios that cannot be played out is appealing. Sending pictures at times of the day when it is genuinely distracting makes me giggle. Texting suggestive ideas, building on it and abruptly ending the conversation? Not me! Sharing that, “My fingers were between my thighs a few minutes ago.” when out for a meal or in a public place achieves such pleasing results. Sharing one of my sexy written stories and knowing exactly the response it will create warms me up in all the right ways. Mentioning in passing that, “I’m not wearing panties.” or saying that, “I want to get on my knees and linger there for a long, long time.”This is who I am.
Porn, naughty stories and “dressing up” are things I incorporate into my days and nights. Spontaneity should not be overlooked. Sliding my hands up a shirt or down past a waistband in a dark corner of a public place? Yes please.Climbing on a lap in a car. What surface of the house is yet to be explored? How about a public restroom? Always ready for the challenge. A quickie on the kitchen counter? How fast can my panties drop??? Tie me up, spank me, cover my eyes and surprise me!
Treat me like the Vixen that I am.
About The Author:
Meg is a tenacious person. She has a lot of interesting life stories and likes to challenge herself by learning and trying new things. She is an excellent cook and baker. She can make and decorate elaborate cakes.Health and fitness are a part of her lifestyle. She bought and is living in a foreclosure which she is making her own room by room. She is certified to teach pistol because she believes a woman should be comfortable defending herself. She enjoys hiking and is completing a certification in personal training. She is a badass 50 plus year old woman living life to its fullest.
Photography and Text by Katie Kerl, Copyright 2022
The Long Haul
I am trying to remember the last thing I wrote here and I can not. Life is such a mind fuck. Yes, I said mind fuck. I had covid right after my father died in December and it is now March 30th. In between that time symptoms come and go every few weeks just as If I had covid again.
I write about wellness all the time, I take care of myself, I got the shots, I bought any and everything to get better. I felt absolutely insane complaining about being sick like this because not one person I knew felt that way except the one other person who got it when I did.
Months have past, doctors called, prescriptions written, and NOTHING.
I will go for one or two weeks and be completely fine. Then taken down again. All of this I was not fine with but it was manageable. I could not work out, and slept like a narcoleptic cat. If you know me, sleep is not really my forte.
The thing that finally was enough?
Standing in an upholstery store with my mother and getting chest pains across my back shoulder blades and down my arms.
I’m standing there trying not to upset my mother who just lost my father but the pain just kept spreading.
We ended up in the ER and the woman said this is the most common trait of long haul covid. She kind of smiled with a concerned look on her face and let me know she could give me a recommendation for a pulmonary doctor, but I would be waiting months out like everyone else.
MONTHS you could have serious damage to your internal organs and this woman is saying months.
I really feel for the first responders who have patients like me sitting there saying now what with zero resolution ZERO.
A week later that pain has subsided . I am still run down, but much better.
I decided I am going to live my life freely.
Not that I don’t now, but in a much different way. I will not waste my time doing things I do not want to do. I will see all the things I want to see, take care of my mom, make meaningful connections ,and help as many people as possible in the time that I have here.
The fact so many people have died leads me to believe the ones who are left were meant to move on to the next phase of life.
I am currently sitting in Atlanta at my work experience center area in Atlantic Station . Thinking how much personal work went into sitting here today. Also, how lucky I am to be in such a forward thinking company.
On my way to the airport I passed my old job.
Nothing had changed, the same workers, and I was no longer confined to a building. Amazing business to have the opportunity to design restaurants. I did not want to be a body in a store designing or not.
Last night on the news they said 4 million + people quit their jobs this month. The great resignation is an ongoing thing. You can watch the United States unravel daily. People are fed up. If you play it right you can make a living on Instagram and Tik Tok. That will never be totally for me, but for the people pushing out content three times a day…. GET THAT MONEY
Did I mention we are at war??? Not that I need to tell anyone but, It is 2022 and I feel like we may be using some of those fallout training we were made to do in elementary school. If anyone thinks for a second we’re just safe here I beg you to think again. To all of my Ukrainian friends and just the large population of Russian and Ukrainian people in the Philadelphia area. My heart goes out to both sides. People with families suffering, and ones who are being ridiculed for being Russian. When are we just going to accept PEOPLE as PEOPLE ?!?!? That is the entire point of the world catching fire the last three years.
Start living your best life now. Not tomorrow, not when you feel better, not when you lost weight, and not when you are in a better place .
This piece is going to be as ADD as my brain.
Anyone that has read my past pieces knows that I invest, and am into crypto. For the second time Game Stop and AMC have short squeezed. I held my AMC after trading it many times. I have watched CNBC daily for two years. The first time they said get into crypto was just a few weeks ago right after the war started. There are metaverse and crypto commercials daily on that channel. I had said to many people; crypto will run up again after the shorted stocks do. That is not a new occurrence, more people just caught on.
I took those gains right to my crypto.
I am not sure why so many people hate crypto when the stock market is corrupt. If you could potentially double your business revenue from NFTs & the Metaverse are you really that averse to change you would miss out on this type of real wealth?
Teenagers are making more money than their parents because they get it, just like social media. We are going to see more digital millionaires and billionaires in our lifetime because of this.
My company just created a metaverse, crypto coin, our own wallet, and avatars.
I highly suggest researching blockchain, stable coins, utility coins, transaction based, metaverse related ,and get into some of it now.
Before some are too high to buy into . Get Kracken /Gemini apps, and get interest on your crypto and your US dollar coin.
The Gemini dollar is like 8% some apps up to 12% in some cases.
You become the bank.
One of the old school banks I had an account left in infuriated me. They blocked some of my crypto trades. The teller’s response? “ We are trying to protect you”. Excuse me, overdraft fees ,0% on your savings ,and cards that do not work internationally just sound like they were controlling how I spend. I have never been happier switching than when I did.
It is two days after my 38th Birthday. Last year I was in Miami partying at Miami Music Week. Those few days always set me free. For the first time in a decade I came to the vivid realization that week was no longer for me. At least not in that way.
I still love Miami though. I went in December and did it a much different way. We went to Strawberry Moon pool ,and Dante’s HiFi. Rich Medina played an awesome vinyl set. What I took away from the two experiences; I don’t want to be at your oversold party, I do not want to get treated like a piece of meat at your table, or on your boat with strangers. I am not for sale. Granted not all of Miami is like this, but its the majority of d*ck swinging men trying to get the most pretty women to party with them.
My goal is to own the boat.
They say you meet people at the most unexpected times. If you would have told me I would meet someone at 3 am at a party we both didn’t intend on being at and bonding over Solana.( you would probably ask me what that is. I will let you google that and maybe it will inspire you.) It is now about to be April and he is as supportive of me, my goals, my dad’s death, being covid sick forever, and I am not easy to deal with for most people given my be yourself attitude.
Alice crossed a Mad Hatter who was just as out there and caring as her.
We will see how far this rabbit hole goes lol.
I am beyond blessed and thankful for the life I have right now.
Am I still grieving ? Absolutely
Do I still have awful reoccurring covid symptoms 100%
Did I just drop enough money into crypto in the last four month to help all that just a bit.
You are damn right I did.
Tomorrow I am going to a women’s executive networking event being hosted by KewCali of the Fostered Foundation in Atlanta. It is called The Kewl Experience. One Hundred women coming together to progress forward.
My ability to connect real people together is kind of my superpower. Sounds funny, but I owe everything I have to building relationships.
People ridicule you for going through acquaintances or friends. I will never understand that. If you do not change your circle how will you ever change your life?
How do you grow without expanding your reach and trying new things ?
I usually have some meaningful closing to these pieces.
Not this time. It is more of a warning.
I do not care what you do; just START.
As someone who decided to do just that; I can’t wait to see more people in this position. A position to design your life. Not have it dictated to you.
While I never felt grief like this, I feel free.
No one will be taking that from me.
I walked through my fire . I dare you to do the same.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Katie Kerl was raised in Drexel Hill, Pennsylvania. She is currently living in Northern Liberties, Philadelphia. Katie has a background in Psychology from Drexel University. She is a manager in the commercial/residential design field . Katie can be reached on Instagram @kerlupwithkate
Photography: Tony Ward – Creative Director: KVaughn – Hair Stylist: Michael Connor. Copyright 2022
From Russia With Love: Part 2
Present: Miss Joy’s Tale
As I sit back at my desk and look out my third story window to reflect, a few things come to mind when I think about the present.I’m living the dream I had of residing in Philadelphia and having a happy independent life.In my room sits over 20 houseplants, a petite black and white kitty named Trolley who wears a bright pink tribal print collar (aka my Princess Poops) and there are enough bike parts and sex toys to open up strange bicycle themed sex shop.Every morning I wake up cozy and warm with the sun beaming on my face and start my day with a shower, shit, breakfast and computer work.I’ve been entirely self-employed since August, am on the beautifully arduous journey of self discovery and am a passionate cyclist with 4 bicycles in my stable.
The best thing about being self-employed is that I set my own schedule and truly get to focus on what’s most important to me.Right now what’s most important to me is the relationship I have with myself, body, mind and soul.During my 2.5 years of living in Philly I’ve learned to sit with a lot of uncomfortable feelings and work through them with the help of my support system and sheer determination. Through hours of research, embracing spirituality and food as a way to connect with my Southern Ural roots, I’m finding peace not knowing who my direct family members are – it’s also a slow moving goal searching for my birth parents. Therapy sessions help me to reframe how I handle unforeseen challenges in a calm way without attaching the terms “bad” or “good” to the emotions I feel.As I continue to set strong boundaries and high standards for myself, I feel empowered to take on all the activities and projects that call to me.
Aside from working as a dominatrix in the Philadelphia area, I’m creating a small line of impact play toys made of recycled bicycle parts such as old inner tubes, handlebar grips, and raw leather.My first line consisting of 4 tools ranges from innocent to incredibly mean and is inspired by my trip to San Diego last year when I attempted to bike across the USA.It features shades of terracotta and sand, brass rivets and uses components commonly found on Lowrider bicycles that first gained popularity in California in the 60’s.The next pieces I’m making are inspired by Ural Batyr, the epic poem of the Bashkir people and where the Ural Mountains gained their name from.They will feature carved and burned leather along with symbols from Russian Paganism and Tengrism.
About The Author: Joy Arnold aka Miss Joy is a Philadelphia based Dominatrix that services clients at her center city studio. She is an avid cyclist and is working on a series of adult toys designed from spare bicycle parts. This is her first contribution in collaboration with Tony Ward Studio.
It was hard in the beginning being sentenced to Riverside Correctional Facility, but at the end I was grounded in – as they would say. While serving my time, a corrections officer was harassing me. She was in charge of locking me in every night. One day she came into my cell and I fought her when she tried to have me put into 23/1 for indefinite time.I beat my case due to the fact that I called prison society.It turns out a corrections officer is not allowed to enter a cell without a white shirt or a person above in the chain of command.Fortunately, I only did 30 days in the hole (23/1) where you only shower once every few days and are locked in a cell for 23 hours with nothing but a blanket, a cup, and hopefully toilet paper. You also do not get commissary and if you do you are to only order shower items and writing pads . Yes this is real!
I went to the hole a few times because you have to defend yourself in a place like that, its only you! I also got my Ged and spent days in the law library studying the law and learning different things.At first, I didn’t want to study for Ged because I could not learn by looking at a screen or listen to somebody talk. The program made me wait, because they didn’t think I had it in me to succeed. Then one day I complained to the warden. I told her that I passed all my tests and only missed by one point on the math. She said if I don’t pass the Ged test I owed her because she pushed it through so I could take it. I passed every test without studying. Instead, I was studying on how to beat my own legal case working everyday in the law library when I was supposed to study for the Ged. Certain c/os believed in me. Teachers knew I was smart and when I passed I made it known who made it happen. My teacher started calling everyday (get her this ged test asap ) warden called for the tester. I eventually fired my attorney and went pro se on my case because he said he couldn’t do any better then 3-6 years upstate. I went in there and said what I said and got 23 flat .
When I came home after doing 2 years I tried finding employment but nothing was good enough to be able to make enough money to be approved for apartments; due to the fact I am now an ex felon and have little to no chance even with ex felon friendly companies. So I began going out with friends to after hours places that go from 12-5 and needless to say are all in some area of the hood no matter which one you go to its always in dangerous places. One night I was working and had just bought my car. Somebody broke into my car by busting a window. Now these places barely had security and people would be in there touching you for no money. Customers don’t have to tip. They just pay to get in and pay for drinks so its basically a house party. Hopefully people bring ones. After the night my car got broken into I decided to stop putting myself out there for less and brought myself to Cheerleader’s Gentlemen’s Club in Philly. I heard a lot of people talk about it and I took it as an opportunity. Since then I haven’t been to an after hour or anotherclub.
Since being at Cheerleader’s I’ve gotten an apartment and needless to say that within the first month working there I make a good amount of money. I work every day from 3 to 2 am by choice. I never had stability so I’m excited to be able to finally have it and will make sure I keep it ! Couch room is 20$ a dance. Vip is (30 min) $170 to $650 (1 hour). The customers are high end mostly gentleman who are kind. Some get crazy but alcohol does that.
About The Author: Snow Baby is an exotic dancer at Cheerleader’s Gentlemen’s Club in Philadelphia. This is her first contribution to Tony Ward Studio.